Structural Resonance Interview with Bella
19 January 2010
Alright this is Bella’s Resonance Discussion Interview.
So – we’ll begin with: Bella as ‘Bella’ currently exist within the Experience of herself.
Alright, so – we’ll first give you an Introduction about the Resonance Interviews in terms of how it is – how it works, and, from there How you’re able to Assist and Support Yourself Practically.
Okay, so – the Resonance Discussions or Interviews is about and of that which You are Living as Yourself – that is currently the Underlying Entities which you have developed and defined as ‘Who you Are’ and ‘Lived’ through Sequences of Events and thus through ‘Time’ created Who you call ‘Bella’.
Now, because you are living AS that, you actually won’t See that – so you need an ‘outside’...say ‘outside perspective’, yet it is an ‘inner perspective’ – an ‘inner-outside perspective’ of what is currently influencing, controlling and directing You;
and Where within your ‘Platform’ that is You are you not in Directive-Principle.
Makes Sense?
Bella: Yea.
Resonance: Okay. So –
You are going to be embarking on a ...
Experience in relation to Agreement – okay –
Actually this has been the Primary-Point currently cycling through your mind – ehm... not all the time, but here and there the Thoughts start emerging about the Experience... that is ahead –
Bella: Yea, it started like a...a type of Nervousness, where I would go into a type of ‘imagining’...
Resonance: Various ‘scenarios’
Bella: Yea, various ‘scenarios’ wherein I would also stop myself and tell myself “no, I won’t go into...”, you know...
Resonance: No... Let’s start there – because I mean, it’s quite an important Point that comes-up –
Remember:
Thoughts and Play-Outs of ‘events’ and ‘scenarios’...you know, what’s quite interesting is that Thoughts always have only two Dimensions to it:
The One Dimension is your Past; the Other Dimension is the Future – okay?
Now – what is very interesting about Thoughts, in terms of when they start Coming-up:
You can take a Thought and See the Nature of the Thoughts in relation to those Two Dimensions: the Future and the Past.
So what I do within the ‘scenarios’ that are Playing-out – so you’ve got your... let’s call it, you’ve got your ‘scenarios’ – is Observe and Break-down what is coming-up in relation to your Past and in relation to the Future.
In other words How is this ‘scenario’ that’s Playing-out within your mind related to your Past that is currently creating your Future.
Okay –
Because you’ll always find You are Here: in between these Two Play-Outs; and this ‘scenario’ is coming-up; Now what this ‘scenario’, this Thought will Show you, is What of the Past you haven’t Dealt-with, that is currently creating the Future, okay?
Bella: Yes.
Resonance: So your ‘scenario’ will have an Image for-example of a Future Play-Out. But – to have a Look at Why this is coming-up in your Mind – Have a Look at your Past.
Bella: Yes.
Resonance: Because what in-essence the Future-Projection of your ‘scenario’ is showing, is that there is a Past-Point that you haven’t Dealt-with, that you’re going to re-create in the Future.
Bella: Yea.
Resonance: So I’d say, What comes-up, Write it down, only in the ‘capacity’ in which it has come-up in your Mind – only that – one work with Only what comes-up currently –
Bella: Break-it down to What it’s showing me in terms of...
Resonance: Yes – What is it that you’re wanting to Re-create – you apply Self-Forgiveness, you Release – and when it Comes-up again, you say No, Stop, I’ve looked at this Point, if I participate in this in any way whatsoever, I know where it’s gonna take me. I do not accept or allow that.
Bella: Yea.
Resonance: Okay – So you’ve got that ‘Framework’ for yourself.
Now – in terms of Agreement. Now, specifically in terms of your...your case
Is the Following: What is Mis-understood in relation to Agreements is that: Beings tend to place their Focus on the Agreement, instead of Self.
Alright – Especially when You’re Walking into a ‘scenario’ or a Situation where You are going to have to Stand at a Point of Directive-Principle, alright –
Realize and do not forget, that it’s not about creating an Agreement as another Entity separate from yourself with another Being.
Agreement starts with Self.
This is Me Here, that is willing to Walk Within Another-Being – okay – to assist and support Me Here within my process of Self-Realization.
So it’s a Support-Agreement in-essence that happens.
Bella: Yea.
Resonance: But the Focus-Point is: Self.
It is not the Agreement.
Bella: Okay.
Resonance: Makes Sense?
You have to Live the Agreement As Yourself within the Point of “I am supporting Me in Walking With Another to Self-Realize Me”.
Okay?
Bella: Yea.
Resonance: Because what you have a tendency of doing within the Past, is trying to ‘construct’ an Agreement. But then you have your two ‘Players’, and you’re trying to ‘create an Agreement’ between two ‘Players’ from a Point of Separation –
Your Focus is the Agreement; your Focus is not Yourself.
I’ll go into it more specifically.
Bella: Cool.
Resonance: But does that Starting-Point make sense – of what you’ve done in the Past?
Bella: Yea.
Resonance: Okay, so now –
What I’d say is the following, in terms of approaching your current Experiences – is saying:
This is Who I am – This is What I’m Walking – This is How I am Walking –
So, This is Who I am – This is What I’m Walking – and This is How I am Walking – and this is Why I’m Walking.
Okay –
Bella: Yea.
Resonance: So there you’ve got You – this is Your Process – Alright?
Now – in terms of...I’d say ‘Live That’ – in...the Other Being that you are going to be Walking-with – okay – You simply first ‘Walk Example’.
Bella: Yea.
Resonance: That’s it.
Bella: Okay.
Resonance: Does that make sense?
Bella: Yea.
Resonance: You stick to Your Living-Principles. Okay? For now.
Bella: Yea.
Resonance: That is all I would suggest. Just that.
The Agreement in terms of the Being – of course he hasn’t yet ‘Walked’ anything in terms of Desteni from the perspective of how You’ve walked with-it.
So first – you walk a Living-Example.
Bella: Okay.
Resonance: Alright – You gently start ...kind of ‘waving him in’, with...when you start communicating or speaking, but it’s...it is...it’s not a form of ‘trying to convert’.
Bella: Yes. It’s Sharing Myself and my Process.
Resonance: Yea, just Sharing You.
Bella: Yes.
Resonance: If you see a ‘Point’, you go...if you’ve ‘Handled-it’ yourself or you ‘walk with-it’, you go “You know what, I’ve experienced it before, I’ve approached it this way...”
Bella: Yea.
Resonance: It’s not a Point of ‘forcing’ either.
Bella: Yea.
Resonance: So be careful of ‘converting’ and ‘forcing’ a Being to ‘fit-into’ a Want, Need and Desire of an Agreement.
Bella: Yea. Okay.
Resonance: Because what happens is also then: You ‘lose sight’ of the Actual Being and your whole Focus (is) on Agreement – you ‘lose sight’ of Yourself – and it ends-up being a ‘Relationship Break-down’ without even the ‘Relationship’ happening in the first place.
Makes sense?
Bella: Yea.
Resonance: Alright, so – you’ve got that Principle – but Bella, remember: the Focus is You – remember that within Your ‘Moving’, especially in terms of the Matrix and the World ‘out there’ = you Stick to your Living-Principles, wherein you Realize: All you Have is You, in any given situation. Okay –
Bella: Yea.
Resonance: Ehm – Now – okay, we’ve got That-Point and we’ve got That-Point –
You understand this – How to Do-this, how to Walk-this?
Bella: Yea.
Resonance: Okay – Primary-Factor in terms of ‘Emotion’ that we’re gonna be looking-at –
Those (point so far) were just more ‘Preparation’-Points for You and your ‘Path’ that you’re going to be Walking;
Now – let’s into a more Specific-Point; that’s gonna be in relation to the ‘Pie-Chart’ that you’re gonna be working-with with Esteni.
Bella: Cool.
Resonance: The Emotion you’re ‘looking-at’ is ‘Anxiety’. Okay –
Now – from the Word ‘Anxiety’ we’ve got the Word ‘Protection’ and ‘Defence’.
Okay –
Now, You have Experienced the World, so to speak; You have Walked your Experience within the World, you’ve been ‘out there’...
You got a ‘Automated’-System ‘running’: It’s your ‘Protection- and Defence-System’.
Okay – that Originated from ‘Mistrust’ and ‘Fear of Betrayal’ – okay –
So in-essence Your ‘Definition’ of People is that: “They ‘Cannot be Trusted’ because they may or might ‘Betray’-me”.
So therefore, when you Meet a Being, or even in the presence of a Being or Beings, you immediately Access ‘Anxiety’ – You go into ‘Protection- and Defence-Mode’ –
to ‘Protect’ and ‘Defend’-Yourself against your Fear, which cause ‘Anxiety of People’ – because of that ‘Definition’ you’ve given All People in-essence.
Does that make sense?
So that’s why, for example –
You’d Allow...it’s quite fascinating what you’d do:
because here are You, alright, ‘All of You’ –
It’s quite interesting what you do is: when you’re with a Person, you’ll take ‘Everything of Yourself’, ‘Hide’-it In-there in your ‘stomach’,
You Put-up your ‘Guard’ which is your ‘Protection-Mechanism’ and you’ll just bring-out like just this little-‘Strand’ of Yourself out, when you’re with a Being – just, just that little-bit –
and that’s it. And you’ll always make-sure that you ‘keep People at arm’s length’ from Yourself, always.
You will not allow a Person to go In-there with You – meaning, you won’t ‘Be You’ and just Share.
It’s always, Even, for-example, in your-Walking: You’re always ‘on guard’.
‘On-Guard’ – walking “quickly here, quickly there, just finish doing my thing and when I’m done then I’m out of here – I don’t wanna be around People...”
Fascinating – it’s like a Mouse in a... Cat’s Den, or something, that see a ‘piece of cheese’, and the Cats are roaming, and this Mouse goes “Okay (taking some quick breaths)”, and then you go, “okay, quick – in – out” –
Makes sense?
Bella: Yea.
Resonance: And the Cats are like “hey Mouse, what are you up to?” – and the Mouse is like, “Okay, just for a moment, okay, Protection! Defence! Stand – okay – it’ll be over soon, it’ll be over soon...” And once it’s over – Run away, immediately.
So you’ve got your ‘Guard-Up’ Inside-Yourself, and you’ve got your ‘Space’ which has been discussed many times, but I’m gonna give you a nice Lay-Out of How it is that you’re actually Doing this whole Play-Out thing within yourself.
I mean, Why it is that you’ve been ‘struggling’ with Agreement so much – okay –
So – See how this works? How you’re doing this –
Bella: Yea.
Resonance: Okay. Now, an interesting thing is:
You Want to be with Someone. But the interesting thing is that: that Want, Need and Desire to Be with Someone is Only based on ‘Bella’s Terms’.
Bella: ...the ‘Rules’.
Resonance: Yes, the ‘Rules’. And these ‘Rules’ she will ‘construct’ in a way to make-sure that the Being that She decided to go into Agreement with her, stays Within these ‘Rules’, so that...as to ‘ensure’ that ‘Bella doesn’t have to go into Intimacy’ –
or Actually Opening-Up.
Okay – So what you do is you ‘use’ the Agreement – you ‘construct’ it within ‘Rules’ and ‘Terms’ by which the Other-Being must Abide – so there’s No Equality within even Establishing the Agreement –
You’re taking ‘total Control’ of this; so that You can always know that ‘these are the Rules’ – you’re making-sure that this Being will Abide by these ‘Rules’ – therefore You don’t have to exist in Fear and Anxiety of You being ‘exposed’ or having to become Intimate and Actually Opening-Up,
and, you know, being with the Being and Actually Seeing the Being.
So, what we’re saying here is: You’re not at-all recognizing Beings – you’re not Seeing the Actual-Being, because you’re not Seeing even Yourself.
You Haven’t yet Actually been Intimate with You.
You Haven’t yet Actually Opened-Up to You.
Therefore you’ll take the...you’ll take your Agreement for-example, you’ll ‘construct’-it in a way where You can remain within you ‘Protection-/Defence-Mechanism’ that you’ve ‘constructed’ Within-Yourself,
So you’d even use the Agreement as a ‘place to Hide-Yourself’.
But what’s ‘Pulling’-You extremely within this Want, Need and Desire for Agreement – is Sex.
Because you Know: Within Sex – you will and may or might within that Moment Allow-Yourself to Open-Up, to Experience-Yourself sexually –
you know, just Even that ‘Feeling’ within having Sex, or that ‘Feeling’ within having Touch –
that, Only that Moment, you will Allow-Yourself to Allow-Yourself to Experience You;
But not Anywhere- or Anyhow-Else;
Only in ‘Those-Moments’, you’ll Give-Yourself that little-bit of Allowance at-least.
See what you’re doing?
Bella: Yea – I see the ‘construct’ – I can Follow-it up – but I couldn’t say that I know ‘How’ I’m doing-it.
Resonance: Okay, I’ll explain it to you all again – I’m just giving you first the Lay-Out of How you’re Doing and...
Bella: That I understand.
Resonance: ... Creating and Manifesting your Reality.
So for-example, have a Look: You’ll approach a ‘construct’ – but you’ll approach a ‘construct’ ‘constructively’ – meaning: you won’t Allow-Yourself to Actually go Into a Point and Experience-it for Yourself.
You kind of Look at everything ‘at arm’s length’. You Look at it ‘there’. You won’t Look at it ‘Here Within Yourself’:
How am I Actually Experiencing-it?
Like ‘Free-Flow-Writing – you know, Actually just sit-down and just Write: What it is that I’m Experiencing within myself – and Allowing-Yourself to Actually Go Into-it and Experience-it.
You Haven’t Allowed Any of that , because you’ve....
Bella: ....Rarely.
Resonance: You’re very Scared of ‘Losing Yourself Within All that you’re Actually Experiencing’ Inside-Yourself –
Bella: Yea
Resonance: So you Have to Look at the ‘Fear of Losing Self’ within being Intimate and Open with Yourself.
Bella: ‘Fascinating’.
Resonance: That’s why your Agreement couldn’t be ‘working’, because there was no Intimacy or Openness Even Within Yourself – so How can you expect that to happen within the Agreement.
Which is Actually the Base-Point upon-which Agreements are Established = Intimacy and Openness and Frankness. Makes sense?
Bella: Yea.
Resonance: Okay –
I’m gonna go over-it one more time, more in Detail.
I just gave you the Lay-Out of Where we’re going with this whole-Interview.
Bella: Okay.
Resonance: So let’s have a Look at-it again:
Here are ‘You’.
Here’s ‘your World’ – ‘Bella’s World’.
Okay –
Now – You’ll Only Allow-Yourself to Show a little ‘Thread of Yourself’ – so Actually I should say ‘Bella’ (= drawing a ‘Thread’) – Okay;
The Rest of ‘You’: you’ve got ‘Locked Inside-Yourself’, with the ‘Protection- and Defence-Mechanism-System’.
These Lines I’m drawing here are like ‘You’ in what you’re Experiencing Inside-Yourself –
This little...System here is your ‘Protection- and Defence-Mechanism’.
Okay?
So – at the moment, there exist Two of ‘You’: this One-Thread of ‘You’ that you will allow to Come-through, when you for-example Communicate with Beings for a moment;
The ‘Rest’, you leave Locked-up Inside-Yourself Completely.
When you’re Working with a ‘Point’ – you’ll Do the exact same thing, even Towards Yourself: You’ll Only Allow a little-‘Thread’ of ‘What you’re Looking-at’ to Come-through – the Rest of what you’re Actually Really Experiencing about ‘What you’re Looking-at’ – You don’t even go-there, at all.
What does that mean?
You’re Not Allowing-Yourself to FEEL.
At all.
Bella: Yea, that makes sense. I can see that...
Resonance: You Haven’t Allowed-Yourself to FEEL.
Now – You have your Room, within which you Let-go of the ‘Protection- and Defence-Mechanism’ – meaning, you’re Not in Anxiety all the time –
But you still will Keep-Yourself ‘Locked Into-Yourself’ – you’ll Keep-Yourself ‘Busy’ –
In your Room, you’ll Keep Yourself Busy, with lots of different things – to Not have to Face what it is that you’re Actually Experiencing and Feeling Inside-Yourself.
Okay – that’s in relation to your World, alright?
When you come into Contact with Beings: Immediately you go into Anxiety, your ‘Protection- and Defence-Mechanism’ Comes-up, and You will approach People;
If a Person Approaches You = you Live this ‘Protection- and Defence-Mechanism’ – and if they for-example would assist and support or show you a ‘point’ – you immediately want to attack and go “No, that’s not it” or “I’m listening to what you’re saying, But”, or...
You have a whole ‘Design’ in which you immediately cut-off Anything a Being says about You, in all terms.
The Only Person you Can’t Do that with, which is interestingly enough, is Bernard. That you realize.
Bella: Yea.
Resonance: But with Other Beings – you Won’t Allow-Them Close in any way whatsoever.
So – Observe that Within-Yourself: When Beings Approaches You, or...Says something about you or of you that they’ve noticed – what is your Reaction immediately – You React immediately, which is your first Indication of: Oh-oh, Mind.
Bella: Yea.
Resonance: You’re not unconditionally inviting the Being Into You As You, in terms of Unconditionally Seeing What it is that they are Noting or Observing about you/of you –
Maybe it’s relevant, maybe it’s not – but that’s for You to self-assess in Self-Honesty.
Bella: Yea. Absolutely.
There’s one interesting Point though, that I find myself to often actually ‘wish for that Point’ that People would, you know, Share if they ‘see something’ or ‘observe something’...
Resonance: They ‘tried’ but they are Scared. Because you go into ‘attack-mode’. That’s why...Have a Look – have a Look in your World, How many Beings just come to You to just Talk and Relax?
Bella: No-one.
Resonance: Now – the Question you always have to ask yourself is:
Bella & Resonance: How am I creating this...
Resonance: ...within my world –
Bella: Yea.
Resonance: Alright – Why am I pushing Beings away – Why am I not allowing Beings within My-World?
Okay – this is mainly because of this ‘Protection- and Defence-Mechanism’, because you’re always in ‘Anxiety towards People’ –
Based on and within the Fear of Them Seeing You....Not even Them Seeing You, (it’s) based on the Fear of You Opening-Up Yourself, and Facing what it is that You are Fearing About-Yourself, which is: to FEEL.
You Fear ‘Feeling’, you fear ‘Experiencing-Yourself’, you fear ‘Opening Yourself Up’ – because you fear that you’re going to ‘Lose-Yourself’,
and then You Open-Up to Anything or Anyone, that They might ‘Betray’ what you Share of-Yourself To-Them.
But that Point of ‘Mistrusting Others’ and ‘Fear of Betrayal’ is just a Manipulation-Point in-essence: That’s another Point that You’re Using,
Bella: as ‘Defence-Mechanism’
Resonance: ...to Not Face what it is that you’re Actually Feeling and Experiencing Inside-Yourself. And there’s a lot of things ‘in-there’, especially in relation to Emotions & Feelings that you Haven’t Allowed-Yourself to Look-at;
Experiences in the Past, that you’ve ‘Shifted’ in your Mind, that you Haven’t Looked-at in terms of How You actually Experience-Yourself in those Moments.
You’ve Seen them or Defined them as You being ‘Weak’ and a ‘Victim’ and... especially the Word ‘Weak’;
And you’ve Locked them Up Inside-Yourself and said “I’m not going to have this happen to me again”, and then you went to the Polarity of Believing you have to be ‘Strong’ –
Bella: Yea.
Resonance: ... You ‘have to become Man-Like’ in a way – and so you have created your Mind ‘structurally’ as a ‘Man’.
Meaning: being ‘Feel-less’ – Not Allowing-Yourself to Feel.
And you approach Everything ‘Constructively’ – through a ‘Construct’ – Not Allowing-Yourself to Let-Go and Actually Feel.
Does That make sense?
Bella: Yea.
Resonance: So –
Bella: ‘Cool’. From That perspective I see that it can be very supportive where I’m going to now.
Resonance: I’m not finished yet though.
(Chuckle)
There’s a lot of Points I’m discussing here that you have to re-listen to again –
Bella: Absolutely.
Resonance: (Points) that you’ve gotta Lay-Out for Yourself and See How and Where you’re Doing this within your World –
And you’ve gotta Stop.
Bella: Yea.
Resonance: But first, before you can Do-that, of course: You’ve gotta Allow-Yourself to Feel.
Okay so we’ve discussed this Point; Let’s go back to ‘Bella’ with the ‘Protection- and Defence-Mechanism’ that you’ve ‘constructed’ because of your ‘Fear of Feeling’, that you have then Projected onto Other-Beings, saying that you ‘can’t Trust them’ because you fear ‘Betrayal’, but that’s not Real – that’ the...
Bella: ...‘Explanation’ in the Mind.
Resonance: Yea – that’s your Justification or ‘Reason’ that you’re using to Not Allow-Yourself to Open-Up to Yourself and thus Share-Yourself with Others.
Okay?
Bella: Yea.
Resonance: So you’d go and you’d ‘Be with Beings’ for a Moment, but you’ll Only Share a ‘Thread’ of-Yourself with Them –
And also (share) Only a ‘Thread’ of-Yourself With Yourself.
Bella: Yea.
Resonance: Then you’ve got your Point with, for-example, Even within Agreements or Relationships or Experiences ‘like that’ –
where Only in a Moment of Touch, or an Experience within Sex, where You would Only Allow a ‘Thread’ of Self-Experience for Yourself, and that’s it.
You’ll ‘construct’ and ‘create’ the Agreement in such a way where You’re always ‘in-Control’.
Bella: Okay.
Resonance: You’ll not even ‘Recognize’ the Other Being for being a Being.
In-essence, They don’t even Exist within-You.
All that’s happening within Yourself, is You wanting to ‘maintain’ That ‘Protection- and Defence-Mechanism’ to ensure that ‘You never Allow-Yourself to Feel’.
Bella: Okay.
Resonance: Because You see ‘Feeling’ as:
‘Weakness’ –
and You “need to be ‘Strong’ and ‘Constructive’ and Not Allow-Yourself to at all even to go Into-Yourself because that’s ‘Weak,”.
Alright?
Bella: Yea.
Resonance: You are Holding a ‘very strong Expectation’ of-Yourself –
that You ‘have to ‘maintain’’:
that Expectation is “I must be ‘strong,”
Bella: I see.
Resonance: “No-one can or may see Any Form of ‘Weakness, within Myself”.
Now understand: What I mean by ‘Feeling’ is – I’m not saying ‘Crying’, alright?
‘Crying’ is a Release – is an ‘Outflow’ of Feeling, it is not ‘Feeling’.
‘Feeling’ Is – for-example, Going Into a ‘Point’ – Actually Re-Living it Within-Yourself Completely, as though it’s happening to you again in Real-Time –
and writing-down What Is-it that I am Actually Experiencing Inside-Myself.
‘Feeling’ is your Actual Experience of You In that current-Event, In that Moment.
Okay –
So Bella – ‘Bella’ has to Embark on a Process of ‘Opening-Up’ – and Allowing-Herself to Feel.
Does that make sense?
Bella: Yea.
Resonance: So – to go right to the Core of this whole Experience:
Your ‘Pie’ that you have to do – I’m gonna suggest you do Two:
Your first Primary one, is gonna be your ‘Mother’ – alright – Specifically focusing on How You Experienced-Yourself with your Mother:
“My Actual Experience of and with Mother” – here you focus on Particular Events that Stood-out for You – that had an Actual Impact on ‘How You Felt’ within those.
Now another Point: I want you to write-out your Experiences as, like, Lines: Full Complete Lines – not following any ‘structure’ – you’re just gonna Write.
Bella: Okay.
Resonance: Any form of ‘structure’, it mean you are going into your Mind, you wanna ‘structure’-it in a certain way, so that you can Only ‘Look at-it structurally’ – and not actually go-Into How you are Feeling about your Experience –
Bella: Okay. So – just write one after the other, word after word, line after line.
Resonance: Yea, You just write, you just write. It’s a Flow that has to happen.
The Moment to go into your Head and want to Look at-it in various different ways: You Stop Yourself. You just Sit here and you Write, In the Moment, what Comes-up as you Look at One Event with your Mother.
Remember, it’s not about your Mother – (it’s) How You Experience-Yourself with your Mother.
Bella: Yea.
Resonance: Okay – she’s been the ‘Primary-Facet’ within your Reality, your World.
Bella: So within the ‘Pie’ – the ‘Pie-Pieces’ will be the ‘Events’ –
Resonance: Yes.
Bella: Okay, and the...and therefore the specific-Experiences of-Myself through the ‘Events’.
Resonance: Yes.
The next one (‘Pie’) you’re gonna Do is your ‘Father’ –
He hasn’t been in your Reality much, he hasn’t had such a great-Impact – Yet:
Within Not-having an Impact, he Had an Impact.
Bella: Yea.
Resonance: ...which is interesting.
So – it’s quite interesting because – Here you have your One-Polarity with your Mother which had Impact Directly – okay – ‘Direct-Impact’;
Here you have your Father, which had your ‘Indirect-Impact’.
Now what happened within most your Points, is that you had your ‘Direct-Impact’ from your Mother – direct – then you had your ‘Indirect-Impact’: your Father –
and here are You Experiencing these Two ‘Outflows’ – and this is happening Inside-You (drawing lines like ‘Turmoil’ Inside);
And now you’ve Lived your-Life trying to ‘Diffuse’ these ‘Indirect’- and ‘Direct’-Forces, and...
Trying to find Peace – Bella is ‘looking for Peace’ –
a Place where she can just Let-go and Be – not have to Fight all the time or try and be ‘Strong’.
Does that make sense?
Bella: Yea.
Resonance: That’s what you’ve Always been Looking-for, Bella: is Peace; Actual Real Peace.
To have Peace – you first have to Pick-up All the Pieces that you ‘left’ in your-Life –
and ‘Piece-Yourself Together’ One by One by One – until you’re Here, Whole, Complete – as ‘You’, Accepting-You, Loving-You, being Comfortable with You –
in That ‘Completion’ you’ll ‘find’ what you’ve been ‘Looking-for’.
Does that make sense?
Bella: Yea.
Resonance: Realize you’re Not going to ‘find’-it in Agreement.
Bella: Yea.
Resonance: Yet You Are at the same time (chuckle)
Which is interesting – meaning:
Understand, in terms of ‘How and Who You Are’: You are quite ‘Self-Substantial’, meaning, You Don’t particularly ‘need’ an Agreement to Walk your Process.
You’ve Walked Alone for most of your-Life anyway.
Bella: Yea.
Resonance: Yet – Having an Agreement, meaning: Walking With Someone, could be Fun.
Makes sense?
Bella: Yea.
Resonance: But remember – Even ‘With that’ – the Focus is not on the Other Being, it’s not on the Agreement as a ‘separate Entity’ –
You’re Walking a ‘Self-Agreement’ With Yourself, SHARING that-Walking Of that Experience with Another;
But the Primary-Focus is YOU.
Bella: Yea.
Resonance: Remember, the Moment you wanna try and focus on ‘him’ or even the Agreement = you’re going in Separation.
Bella: Okay.
Resonance: That’s why, “I’m Walking with Me Here – Would you Join me in Walking-With?”
And Then, from there, when That-Point “Would you Join me Walking-With” – once that “Yes” comes – Then you establish an Agreement, where you Both Lay-Out How you’re going to Assist and Support Yourselfs – and then from there Assist and Support Each-Other.
Does that make sense?
But it’s always Self first.
Bella: Yea.
Resonance: Alright – So, Bella – to ‘Find’ what you’ve been ‘Looking-for’ your ‘Whole-Life’, you’re gonna start with the ‘Pies’ –
See, Even the ‘Pies’ are in ‘Pieces’ – you’ve got to ‘Complete-Yourself’ through Picking-Up All the ‘Pieces’ and Standing Within-That Completion –
Does that make sense?
So it’s like – you’re gonna Take a ‘Piece of your-Life’ – you’re gonna Work with-it – and In that One ‘Piece’ = ‘Complete-Yourself in that Piece’.
So it’s like, if you take for-example your-Life as a ‘Puzzle’ – okay – You’ve got All the ‘Pieces’ that you’ve ‘left behind’ within your-Reality:
in which You’re not Present, meaning: you’ve Separated-Yourself from those Experiences;
Inside-Yourself at the moment, You are in Complete and Utter Pieces;
with all those Pieces you were not Present in – Yet is still Directing, Influencing and Controlling your Total-Reality.
Now what you’re gonna Do is You’re gonna Take One-‘Piece’ – you’re gonna ‘Complete-Yourself Within that Piece’ – does that make sense?
Then you’re gonna Take the next-‘Piece’ and then ‘Complete-Yourself Within that Piece’ –
What I mean by ‘Complete-Yourself’ is: you’re gonna Stand...you’re gonna Stand-Up Within that Experience – and Not accept and allow that-Experience to Direct and Control-You or Define-You.
You Take-it and you Stand Equal and One – Stand: I ‘make Peace’ with that-Part of my Past.
You’ve gotta make Peace with your-Past, in-essence.
Bella: Yea.
Resonance: Because ‘All of it’ is still Directing and Controlling You.
Within that Process, this that’s currently going-on Inside-You will start becoming ‘more quiet’, and quiet and quiet – as you Complete-‘You’ and All the Pieces that you have Scattered-Yourself within, throughout your-Life – until:
You are One and Equal with ‘You’.
Does that make sense?
Bella: Yes.
Resonance: The Process that you’re busy Walking. Okay?
Bella: Yes.
Resonance: So we’re gonna start with the first Two-‘Pieces’ (‘Mother’ and ‘Father’)
Bella: Ooooh-kay (chuckle)
Resonance: Remember it’s ‘seven years’ minimum, Bella.
Bella: Yea.
Resonance: Start with the first Two-‘Pieces’ which is your Two-‘Pies’: ‘Mother’, ‘Father’.
‘Mother’ – you’re gonna write about your ‘Direct-Experiences’ – because here you had Direct-Experiences.
There (‘Father’) you’re gonna write about your Indirect-Experiences;
What does that mean: your Absence of your Father within your-Life – What did you experience about-that?
Bella: Okay – So it’s not gonna be based on ‘Events’, rather than by...or maybe sometimes –
Resonance: Sometimes...Events ....for-example “I wished I had a Father to have shown me this, or been here for that” or “Why wasn’t he there” – and “I felt so alone and lonely and I cried to ‘God,” and “Why did ‘God, not give me a Father that’s here to Walk with me – I see other Children, there’s their Father with them and I didn’t have a Father that’s Walking with me in that way or Hugging me in that way” – “I wish I had that” –
Does that make sense?
It’s like that.
So here you’ve got...here is your ‘Present’ – here’s your ‘Absence’.
Meaning: She (Mother) was ‘present’ – He (Father) was ‘absent’.
Bella: Yea, yea.
Resonance: You Write about those Two-Points.
Bella: Okay.
Resonance: And this ‘Present’ is ‘your-Present’ – your ‘Absence’ is ‘your-Past’ – and from These Two Primary-Points, You are creating ‘your-Future’...
...which hasn’t been very ‘constructive and supportive’ for You –
Bella: No...
Resonance: Because you’ve been trying...You’ve actually been existing in These-Two ‘Direct’- & ‘Indirect’-Forces Controlling and Directing You,
which has been Causing This Inside-Yourself the whole time that you’ve Refused to Look-at.
Therefore you’ve always Walked...kinda ‘staunch’, in a ‘Man-like manner’ Within Yourself...
Bella: Yea.
Resonance: Okay – So, Bella – We’re gonna Take-it One-‘Piece’ at a time – One-Step at a time;
Bella: Alright cool.
So these Two ‘Pies’ I can ‘Do’ and Work with Esteni with – before I leave?
Resonance: Yea. You can even work with-it... just to get the ‘Ground-Work’ of how to do-it...
Bella: Yea.
So – for the ‘Mother-Pie’ you said I’m gonna write ‘in Flow’ –
‘Father’ the same-thing.
Okay.
Resonance: ‘Father’ the same-thing. You Don’t wanna write in any ‘Format’
Bella: or ‘Structure’, yea.
Resonance: You’re just wanna Write – You.
Bella: Yea.
Resonance: ‘Events’ will Come-up and you Write about the Experience of Yourself.
You have to start Writing about your Self-Experience and Allow-Yourself to Actually Feel.
If ‘Crying’ Comes – great.
If ‘Anger’ Comes – You Write-Out, you know, “I’m Angry now, and, and I WAS Angry...” and you know, you Write IN the Moment.
Bella: Okay.
Resonance: Very Important – because you need to Open-Up and get this Stuff Out of You.
Bella: Okay.
Resonance: So that’s basically Your-Process that you’re busy ‘Walking’;
because You don’t want this Shit to influence your-Life, Bella.
Bella: No.
Resonance: So we can start ‘Walking the Process of Self-Completion’, so You can Be at-Peace With-You.
Bella: Yea.
Resonance: Isn’t that what you’ve always Wanted?
Bella: Yea.
Resonance: Just Be at-Peace.
Bella: Yea.
Resonance: ‘Finally’.
Okay – so that’s it.
So it all make sense?
Bella: Yes.
Resonance: Maybe watch-out for the ‘Points’ now when you start Approaching Beings, you know...
Remember, the thing is now, that you can’t expect Beings to...or ‘wait’ for Beings to ‘Come to You’ –
And that you’ve gotta Allow-Yourself to Participate with Beings. Okay?
Bella: Yea.
Resonance: But not from the sense of ‘feeling guilty’ or ‘wanting an outcome’ while Communicating with them, or anything –
You’re just being ‘You’ – be Natural – In the Moment –
If you see any Reactions still Coming-up when they start talking to You – just Breathe through them, I’ll just Breathe through them –
Bella: Yea.
Resonance: ...and just Let-Go.
You need to ‘Learn’ how to Enjoy Participating with Other-Beings and just Let-go, you know;
Bella: (chuckle) Yea.
Resonance: You Know that: You Trust You that when a Point comes-up, You will Direct-it in the Moment.
You don’t need to be ‘en Guard’ the whole-time.
Be Natural.
Bella: Yea.
Resonance: Even if you Live a point Out for a week and then you realize: “Oh Fuck, look what I’ve done” – You’ll Correct-it –
Bella: Yea.
Resonance: You will Stand-Up again – You’ve Proven that to Yourself.
Bella: Yea.
Resonance: So Don’t fear ‘making mistakes’ –
Don’t fear going...’Losing Yourself’ – you’ll Always ‘Find-Yourself’ again.
Makes sense?
Bella: Yea.
Resonance: So I’d – from this Moment: ‘Embark Life’ –
Embracing-it and Allowing-Myself to be ‘Natural’ – and Know that: I trust Me, that I will apply Me in the Moment accordingly – and Fuck if I make a ‘mistake’ – I Know I will Stand-Up again.”
Bella: Yea.
Resonance: Okay? And that’s it.
Bella: Cool.